Saphire rings of amber hate: how can living feel so small?

How can this life we seem to lead, tempt us to leave reality. How are our minds manipulated through our own self thought?! Why do we feel so lonely; so tired, when we know that we are not. Can you tell me why my tears flow daily, why my emotions seem to twist in knots. Can you lead my on my faithless journey, my soul is weak and I can not. My eyes feel heavy, my heart feels empty, so alone so alone so alone. My only option is to navigate my own pity to an unreality ununiform spot. When i feel so weak so tired so alone I cry for myself and nobody knows. how can i feel so fucking pathetic, when i feel my life should be more. Can you just PLEASE tell me what i should do because I don't want to live like this anymore. I feel so pathetic.. but theres nothing i can do.